The Love of A Friend
by HK-47 Scarlet
Summary: Shuichi and Hiro have unspoken feelings for one another, but believe that their friendship transcends their need to romantically get involved. Though they are set on not acting on their feelings, they still struggle to maintain their friendship.
1. Realization

**The Love of A Friend**

**1: Realization**

Nakano Hiroshi's fingers plucked at the strings of his acoustic guitar, though he wasn't paying any real attention to what notes he was hitting. His mind had been elsewhere instead of on his music. It wasn't like him to be so scatter brained, but at this point he wanted to keep that one image from entering his thoughts, and the only way to do that was to think about something else. Unfortunately, every time a thought entered his head that image popped up again, forcing himself to bring up another subject for his mind to dwell on, thus resulting in his sporadic thoughts. All for the sake of avoiding that one image.

_Ayaka, _he thought sadly, _where did I go wrong?_

Before his thoughts on her could go any further, the house phone rang, breaking the five second silence that had befallen his small apartment, much to Hiro's relief.

When he gratefully accepted the phone call, he was greeted with a the high-pitched voice singing his name on the other end of the receiver. "Hiro! Where are you today? We have to practice!"

"Shuichi?" Hiro asked dubiously, setting his guitar on the floor beside his chair. "What do you mean 'practice'?" Hiro was confused, to say the least. The band hadn't made an arrangement to get together today, nor did K force them to work on Sundays anymore. Moreover, Shuichi usually spent his Sundays with Eiri Yuki.

"Band practice," Shuichi responded simply, before deciding to yell into the phone, forcing Hiro to pull it away from his face. "The one time I'm early and you're not here!"

After placing the phone back to his ear, Hiro sighed as he shook his head in disbelief. It's not as if it were the first time Shuichi got the days confused and thought they had work when they didn't, but it was the first time he thought they had work on a _Sunday. _"Shuichi, look around you."

The other end was quiet for a moment, more than likely because his pink-haired friend took the time to look around. "What am I supposed to be looking at?"

"No one else is there, right?" Hiro asked, his lips pulling back into a small smirk. He was genuinely amused by Shuichi's clueless behavior at the moment.

"How'd you know that?" He sounded shocked when he asked the question, as if one had to be psychic to know that no one would be around on a Sunday.

Hiro took a deep breath, not believing Shuichi hadn't gotten it by now. "Listen carefully, Shu," he said, before closing his eyes and reopening them. "Because no one works on a _Sunday!_"

* * *

"So, what happened today?" Hiro asked his best friend, who was currently sitting across from him with a garlic shaker in his hand.

Since Shuichi had already been out and because Hiro lived closest to NG, Hiro had decided to invite him over so they could spend the day together. That way Hiro could get his mind off Ayaka and have fun with his friend, and Shuichi could just, well, be Shuichi and not have anyone reprimand him for it. Anyone usually being Eiri Yuki; at least, that's the impression Hiro had sometimes.

When Shuichi ignored Hiro's question, he prodded a bit further. "Shuichi, what happened today?"

Shuichi continued to shake garlic onto his pizza, not caring that it was piling up. "What do you mean?" he asked lifelessly, his eyes not moving from their spot. His tone was completely void of his usually energetic self; he seemed to have something on his mind, and Hiro had a good idea what it was.

"Is it Yuki-san?" he asked, leaning forward with his arms propped on his lap.

Shuichi's head snapped up to meet Hiro's gaze, his eyes showing a flicker of surprise before they closed. A sigh blew passed his lips as he shook his head, pink locks swaying from side to side. "I just made a little mistake is all. Haven't _you _ever showed up to work on a Sunday?"

"Not unless I had something on my mind and wasn't thinking clearly," Hiro replied. He picked up a can of soda that had been sitting next to him and pulled the tab open, resulting in a fizzing sound to resonate throughout the room. "Besides, you usually spend Sundays with Yuki-san." He took a sip, enjoying the taste of carbonated orange soda before setting it back down. "You've never forgotten a date with him, ever."

"I didn't forget!" Shuichi protested, his eyes now boring holes into Hiro's, though Hiro's own gaze must have been far too intense since Shuichi quickly averted his eyes. "I guess I must have just forgotten it was Sunday." He sighed, setting the garlic shaker down and splaying himself over the floor. "I always used to know it was Sunday because Yuki and I would spend time together. I would always remember, 'tomorrow is the big date with Yuki'. I would count down the days; that's how I kept track of the days of the week." He chuckled at the idea.

"What happened? Why did you forget?" Hiro asked, studying his friend's face for the answers even though he was about to find out anyway.

Shuichi moved his hands behind his head, his eyes now focused on the ceiling. He seemed to have been going off into another world; that world he always went off to when he wanted to escape reality. Hiro had no doubt that it was an interesting place to be; Shuichi's mind, that is. He couldn't blame his friend for getting lost in there so much, not that he knew what was going on in there to begin with.

_It must be nice to have a place to get away from the world, right in your head, _Hiro thought idly. While he was always the type of guy to confront his problems head on, he had to admit to himself that it must have been nice to just get away every once in a while. Even if it were only for a minute.

When Shuichi finally spoke Hiro almost missed it. His voice was barely above a whisper. "I lost track of the days because Yuki and I haven't been spending much time together lately. I mean, I'm used to him blowing me off every now and then, but lately..." he trailed off as his lids closed, making him look as if he were in a peaceful slumber. Hiro took the time to admire his soft features; mainly his little nose, until Shuichi's voice startled him back to reality. "It's like he'd just rather be doing other things than be with me. Anything else. I guess it's been so long since the two of us spent a whole day together that I just lost track of the days."

"You ever consider getting a calender, Shu?" Hiro teased, now moving to lay down on the floor as well, his own arms propping his head up.

Shuichi chuckled, though it seemed forced. For the first time in a while, Shuichi genuinely sounded unhappy. "Maybe I should."

A comforting silence befell the room for what seemed like a whole hour. Hiro had taken the time to get lost in his thoughts, mulling over some things. Though he hadn't particularly noticed, Ayaka had not crossed his mind not once. His thoughts were centered around the other person in the room, and the one feeling he had upon hearing his confession. Joy. He wasn't sure that was it at first, but after a few minutes, or however long the silence lasted, alone with his thoughts, he was able to confirm it. The idea of feeling joy about Shuichi not seeming happy with Yuki made Hiro sick to his stomach, but it was there, plain as day. He thought he figured Shuichi would be happier without Yuki, but deep down Hiro knew that was bullshit. There had to be another reason why Hiro could possibly _want _Shuichi to feel unhappy with Yuki, but he could not think of any. Hiro had made it apparent to himself and Shuichi that he didn't care _how_ he was happy, so long as he was happy _period_.

_Then why am I so happy when he clearly isn't? _he thought miserably.

"Are you going to talk to him?" Hiro asked, suddenly breaking the silence. He knew if Shuichi would just talk to the man then everything would somehow sort themselves out, and Shuichi would be back to his usually peppy, energetic, Yuki-loving self.

He had an idea of what the answer would be too. Somewhere along the lines of, 'I don't want to bother him' or 'I don't want him to get annoyed with me'. That or a 'I'm happy with the way things are' which anyone else would call bullshit on if they saw the look on Shuichi's face. But Hiro knew better. He knew that no matter how miserable or sad Shuichi seemed in his current standing with Eiri Yuki, he was content. Because Shuichi loved him more than anything in the world, and just being on the same planet as him seemed to make the young vocalist happy. And that's all Hiro wanted, was for Shuichi to be happy.

"No."

Hiro turned his head to look at Shuichi, waiting for him to say something more than just 'no', but he didn't. He was surprised, to say the least. He expected a string of excuses for Shuichi to not talk to Yuki; or for him to say he was afraid of him, which he had admitted before. Instead he just received a simple answer of 'no' and that's it.

"No?" he asked, making sure he heard correctly. "Is that all?"

Shuichi didn't shift in his spot. "Well, you asked if I was going to speak to him about it, and I said 'no'. So, I guess that _is_ all."

"I thought you would have more to say than that. Like more dumb excuses." Honestly, Hiro was surprised by Shuichi's attitude. It _almost _sounded as if he just didn't care.

"Hey!" Shuichi sat up and stared down at Hiro, who did not seem phased by his friend's outburst. "What do you mean 'dumb excuses'?

"Well," he started, shifting his gaze to meet Shuichi's, "You're always making up these reasons why you avoid talking to him about this sort of thing, like how you don't want to upset him, or you're afraid of him."

"Those are true!" he protested.

Hiro shut his eyes, trying to think of a way to word his thoughts. He knew how sensitive Shuichi could be, and had learned to phrase things just right when talking to him. When he opened his eyes again, Shuichi had moved closer to him. His violet eyes were boring holes into Hiro's, as if daring him to defy his reasoning. It was then that Hiro knew he hit a soft spot.

"Shuichi, I don't think you're afraid of him - or rather, I don't think that's the reason why you don't want to talk to him."

Shuichi didn't say anything. He only continued to stare at Hiro as if waiting for him to continue. Hiro did just that.

"I think you're afraid of ruining what you have with him. You're afraid of bringing up anything wrong, because then you'd be admitting that your relationship with him isn't perfect."

"I know it's not perfect," he responded hurriedly.

"I know, but you're afraid of finding out that maybe, just maybe, this isn't the kind of relationship you want."

"That's stupid," Shuichi instantly dismissed, waving Hiro off casually. He lay on his back again to continue staring at the ceiling before his eyes closed, going back into that lethargic state. "I'm happy with what I have now," he replied quietly. It seemed more like he was telling himself than he was telling Hiro.

"Sure, for now," Hiro replied knowingly. "But you're afraid that you'll find out-"

"That I'm not really happy," Shuichi interrupted, now sitting up. His brows were furrowed in thought as his intense gaze bored holes into the wall on the other side of the room. Hiro had wanted to say something, but decided against it since Shuichi seemed to be going deep into thought. He was having a realization.

_He's entering that world again, only he's in there to think this time._

After a few more moments of silence, Shuichi sighed. The sigh sounded heavy and seemed to be laced with dread, as if the realization was a bad one.

Hiro scooted closer and lay a supporting hand on his best friend's shoulder, who seemed to relax his body a bit when he did so, causing a small smile to tug at Hiro's lips. "If you really love him like you say you do, then a simple talk won't ruin your relationship. At least, not if you don't let it."

Shuichi didn't say anything right away. Instead, his head lowered as his gaze appeared to drop to his lap. His thin fingers played with the hem of his shorts while he seemed to phase back into that world of his. He had been doing that a lot lately, and Hiro was starting to get a little concerned. It wasn't like his moments where he would just daydream about whatever his mind flocked too either. These thoughts were deep, Hiro could tell. As if he were really contemplating something. Something serious.

"Hiro." Shuichi turned to face him. His eyes shone with determination for the briefest of moments before they softened, taking on an almost pleading look.

But what would Shuichi be pleading for? That's what Hiro was wondering at the moment. Shuichi had looked as if he wanted Hiro to do or say something, though the guitarist had no clue what and it was driving him mad. Shuichi would normally just come out and say it, so he figured it had to have been something he was ashamed of, perhaps. Or something that was really serious. Maybe something he wanted to tell Hiro, but couldn't?

"What are you trying to tell me?" Hiro asked, wanting to find out what was causing such distress to his best friend. He wanted to find out what made Shuichi look so desperate and squash it. Or at the very least, help him get through it.

Hiro saw a multitude of emotions flashing in Shuichi's eyes, but they were gone just as soon as they showed up, leaving Hiro unable to discern what any of them were.

"I'm not trying to tell you anything," he answered finally, his voice sounding neutral. His eyes closed for a moment before opening again, landing back on Hiro.

Shivers crawled through Hiro's spine, though he wasn't sure why. Perhaps he wasn't used to the intensity of Shuichi's gaze. He knew the singer had it in him, and had probably given Yuki stares with greater intensity. But Hiro had never been on the receiving end of one like this before, even when the two stared one another down in anger, which wasn't that rare.

_What are you hiding? _he wanted to ask Shuichi. He wanted to ask him why he seemed worried to tell his best friend, that he knew since high-school, about something that was obviously plaguing his thoughts. But, at the same time, he had the feeling it was something Shuichi would _really _prefer to keep quiet, at least until he was ready to share. That alone was enough for Hiro not to ask any more questions about it.

"So," Hiro said, trying to interrupt the silence in the room. "Are you going to talk to him or not?"

Shuichi just smiled, single handedly destroying the tension in the room with that single look. "Nope!"

"Really? After what we talked about you _still _don't want to talk to him?" Hiro reached for the can of soda he had earlier and took a sip, wincing when he tasted warm, flat liquid instead of cold, fizzy orange soda like he had before.

"I'd rather just keep things the way they are." He replied with the same predictable answer Hiro had expected to receive before. However, that only heightened Hiro's curiosity, leading him back towards the belief that Shuichi had wanted to say something else before, but chickened out at the last minute. Otherwise, why hadn't he just responded like he did now?

Hiro knew; he had been trying to lead up to telling him something. He just didn't know _what _it was.

Hiro found himself to be speechless at the moment. His mind was working overdrive, and for once it wasn't over his shaky relationship with Ayaka. Of course that brought on a new wave of worry to crash onto Hiro; he didn't want to have to worry about two things now.

"If you say so," was all Hiro managed to say. He didn't sound too convincing.

"I do," Shuichi replied as he hopped to his feet. He stared down at Hiro with one of his wide smiles. "I need some fresh air. Let's go for a walk in the park or something."

Hiro had honestly wanted to stay inside. He was tired, and hadn't been getting much sleep lately. It was hard to sleep when his dreams were full of the one he was falling for, unable to do anything about it.

But, he couldn't turn his best friend down. Not when he was staring into those huge, hopeful, violet eyes of his. He just couldn't say no.

"Alright." Hiro stood up, dusting his jeans off out of force of habit, rather than because they were actually dirty. "You wanna' take my bike there?"

Shuichi's eyes lingered on Hiro for a moment before changing focus to the ceiling. "Hiro, that would defeat the whole purpose of taking a walk," he laughed lightly, turning around and slipping into his sneakers. "Hurry up before we waste a whole free day!" he urged playfully as he ran out the door.

Hiro's brows furrowed in contemplation as his lips formed a flat line. There was something about Shuichi's behavior that was bugging him. He was somehow different. It was subtle and well hidden, but he could tell the change was there. Somewhere inside that wonderland Shuichi calls his mind, there was a change occurring, and Hiro wanted to know what it was.

* * *

Shuichi gently pushed open the door to the apartment, trying hard not to allow it to even make a sound. He slid inside when the door was wide enough and just as quietly pushed it closed. As he looked around, he noticed the room seemed empty, almost lifeless. He knew right away that his daily search for Yuki would come up empty, but that didn't stop him from looking anyway.

Not even bothering to turn on the lights, he searched the bedroom, Yuki's study, the bathroom, the kitchen, the closets, the fridge, the cabinets, and even the trash can; he found no sign of his lover, as he thought.

He didn't feel his heart sink to his feet, nor did he feel this undeniable urge to scream Yuki's name to the heavens and sink to his knees. In a way, he felt absolutely nothing at the moment. It was a strange feeling that he didn't quite understand; perhaps he had gotten used to not finding Yuki home? That was the only explanation he found feasible at the moment.

Shuichi found himself at the window of their large balcony, staring out at the thousands of bright lights dotting the city before him. He took comfort in the fact that Yuki was somewhere beyond those lights, in that city, and that he would be coming back. Still, it bothered him that he wasn't feeling as...empty, without him as he normally did. While it was not good, and he knew it, to be so reliant on another human being, Shuichi didn't feel any sense of self confidence or independence for not feeling so lost without Yuki. He just felt...nothing. And it bothered him.

His hand pressed against the cool glass of the window as his forehead did the same. "I _do _love you, Yuki," he whispered, as if he felt the need to convince himself. Maybe Hiro had been right about Shuichi's fears that everything would just crumble. Maybe that's why Shuichi had been feeling unaffected by Yuki's increasing absence the past few weeks.

_Am I too afraid to feel sad? Or worried?_

"I love you, Yuki."

"Is that a fact?"

Startled, Shuichi spun around to face Yuki, his cheeks turning a bit red from embarrassment at being caught in one of his 'moments'. Being caught by Yuki, no less.

When Shuichi realized that Yuki was standing right in front of him, in the apartment, his gaze quickly shot to the ground. It was scary how he seemed to pop without making a sound, and it really creeped Shuichi out, to be honest. What scared him even more, however, was the fact that he still felt nothing. Yes, his love for Yuki was there, as it always has been, and he was sure always would be, but he didn't feel that special tingly feeling he normally did when Yuki showed up. That euphoric state he went into just being in his presence; it was gone.

But he knew he loved him more than anything.

_So why am I feeling this way?_

"So, why are you just standing there talking to yourself?" Yuki asked, his hands in his coat pocket. Shuichi could tell he had just come from outside, and hadn't been hiding anywhere in the house. "In the dark, no less," he added, since Shuichi hadn't turned on a single light since he walked into the apartment.

Shuichi responded by moving over to the couch, practically diving onto it. As he lay on his stomach with his arms folded under his head he searched for something to say to Yuki. Anything. The only thing that came to mind was "I love you" which was all well and good, but Shuichi wanted to say something _else. _Surely he had more to say to his lover than just "I love you" anymore. _Surely _he had other ways to express his love for the blond novelist, like he used to. Saying those three words _couldn't _have been the only way, could it? Shuichi's mind reeled as his eyes shut.

_I know I love Yuki. I can feel it. But, that's __all __I feel. Do I only __think __I love him?_

"Shuichi."

Shuichi's head shot up to see Yuki's form looming over him, his hand reaching down and landing atop Shuichi's messy hair. He sat down beside Shuichi, looking down at him with those honey-like eyes. The young vocalist had no idea what was going through his lover's mind, and strangely enough, he didn't want to know. He didn't want to find out that Yuki was thinking fondly of him. He didn't want to find out that Yuki was silently loving him more than he did now. At least, not at the moment. Because then he would feel guilty...

...Because he feared he was falling out of love with Eiri Yuki.

* * *

**A/N: **I know this chapter seemed short, and not a lot went on, but I assure you that will change in the next chapter, as I am merely establishing the feeling and setting of this fic. Feel free to point out any ways you believe I can improve upon this piece, or any errors you noticed.

**Next Chapter: **Lingering Thoughts of Passion


	2. Lingering thoughts of Passion

**2: Lingering thoughts of Passion**

"Shuichi."

The pink-haired vocalist looked up at Yuki, who had called him for the third time. He studied the older man's face for any inclination as to what he could have possibly been thinking, but found nothing. As usual, his face remained unreadable.

"I missed you," Shuichi said, not wanting to give Yuki the chance to say anything sweet. He was sure the tears would pour out and never let up if he did; just hearing Yuki say anything remotely sweet tended to have that effect on him, and he would cry just as hard if that effect didn't occur. He pushed himself up onto his knees, staring into Yuki's eyes with such intensity that had he not been Eiri Yuki, but someone else, he would have shrunk back.

"Where have you been?" He was asking out of anger. Anger for Yuki disappearing and leaving Shuichi alone to give him the chance to even _think _that he was falling out of love with him. Had Yuki just spent some time with him, Shuichi would not be feeling this way at all. At least, that's what he told himself.

"Out," was the blond's answer as he turned his head to stare off at the other end of the room. He reached into his coat pocket and pulled out a cigarette, placing it between his lips as he got out his lighter as well.

"I mean for the past few weeks." Shuichi leaned down to rest his head on Yuki's lap. He instinctively put his own hand on his head after lighting his cigarette.

Yuki exhaled a puff of smoke as his fingers lightly scratched Shuichi's pink locks. "I've been here the whole time."

Shuichi's eyes closed, trying to get lost in the feeling of the moment. Much to his displeasure, he couldn't get back that feeling he would get whenever Yuki did this particular action. Sure, he felt comfortable, but he was not getting that same tingly feeling that made him fall deeper in love every second of being in Yuki's presence. He couldn't even feel at peace with his feelings being so jumbled and chaotic.

"No you weren't," he replied softly. He turned his body so he could stare up at Yuki. Their eyes met for the longest of seconds, and Shuichi knew that Yuki could go on forever just staring, because Yuki could do anything. He broke eye contact only when he felt like it, not because he couldn't handle it.

_He's so strong, _he thought wistfully. _That's one of the reasons why I love him, right?_

"You're awfully quiet tonight," Yuki commented offhandedly as he finally averted his gaze. He took the cigarette between his fingers and put it out on the ashtray beside him.

"Just enjoying the moment," he lied. In all honesty he didn't quite know whether or not he was enjoying the moment. On one hand it felt good to see Yuki again, while on the other hand he felt like utter crap. He was questioning his love for someone he fought so hard for. Someone who could have kicked him out on his ass several times but didn't. At least, not permanently.

Did he feel _obligated _to love Yuki?

"You're no fun when you're serious," Yuki teased. He had the slightest trace of amusement lacing his words. "At least you're not yelling."

"I used that up on Hiro." He chuckled lightly, recalling the whole day the two spent together. It was a tad hectic due to their large fan base hunting them down every corner, but it was still fun as always. Hanging out with Hiro was fun no matter what they did.

"Is that where you were?" Yuki asked, looking down at him again.

"Yeah," he replied softly, his voice barely above a whisper. His eyelids felt heavy and his body begged for sleep. "Yuki, can we do something tomorrow?"

Yuki's fingers ever so lightly caressed Shuichi's cheek. "I have a deadline to meet."

Shuichi yawned, forcing out his next few words. "You always have a deadline to meet."

"I'm a busy guy."

"You're not busy now," he replied quietly.

When Yuki didn't answer, Shuichi reached out and grabbed the collar of Yuki's coat, pulling him down into a soft kiss. When he felt Yuki returning the kiss, he latched onto his golden locks as if he were afraid of him moving away. They stayed in that position for a while, merely kissing one another until Yuki grabbed Shuichi's hand and pulled it away from his hair, pulling back a few inches.

"What are you thinking now, Shuichi?"

It had just dawned on him how Yuki had been calling him by his name a lot more than usual. He wondered if maybe Yuki was taking him more seriously, as a person and a lover. Perhaps it was his way of saying "I love you" without having to actually say it. Either way, it made Shuichi once again feel that tingly feeling he used to get when with Yuki, and he wanted to hear it as often as possible. In his eyes, that was a sign that he was still in love with Yuki, and that they had a future together. So long as that tingly feeling remained, he would be alright.

"Yuki, I love you."

Shuichi made a move to get comfortable, but instead felt himself being lifted up by Yuki. He latched his arms around the blond's neck so he wouldn't fall as Yuki carried him towards the bedroom. The next morning, Shuichi knew, his mind would be clear, as well as his heart.

He couldn't have been falling out of love with him. The incredibly loud and passionate declarations that were to come tonight was proof enough.

* * *

"No, I understand, Ayaka. It was nice speaking to you again. Goodbye."

Hiro sat on his small couch as he pressed the 'end call' button on his house phone before setting it back onto the receiver. He stared at the phone for a while, his mind playing the conversation he had just had with Ayaka over and over again in his head. He wanted to search for anything she said that _may _have sounded like she was showing signs of forgetting Yuki.

He couldn't find any. Actually, this was the third time she rejected a visit to see him. She had said she was busy, and gave very valid excuses, but Hiro knew.

He knew.

She honestly seemed to like him, and it was obvious that _something _was there, he could tell. But was that 'something' strong enough to make her move on from Eiri Yuki? He seriously doubted it. She was so determined, so hung up on him.

_She's just like Shuichi, _he thought idly as he sunk back into the couch. _Both so determined to not let up on the one that they loved._

"Hiro!"

Hiro nearly fell off the couch when he heard his name exploding from an all too familiar person, who was standing in the doorway of his little apartment. As soon as his heart stopped pounding mercilessly against his ribcage, Hiro addressed his best friend.

"Shuichi, you scared the crap out of me," Hiro breathed out, getting off the couch. "Maybe giving you a spare set of keys was a dumb idea on my part."

Shuichi waved him off with a laugh. "Ready for work?"

"As ready as I'll ever be," he said as he walked over to the door and slipped into his sneakers. He grabbed his keys that hung from a small white hook on the wall and slipped them into his pockets.

"Let's go!" Shuichi called happily as he ran down the hall.

When Hiro got outside, he saw Shuichi already on the bike and ready to go. He walked over to him with a small smile on his face as he watched his friend put on the spare helmet Hiro always kept around for him to use.

"Someone's happy. Did you get laid?" Hiro laughed, but quickly stopped when he saw Shuichi's blush. For some odd reason, it bothered him. The idea of the two making love made him feel wrong, though he wasn't sure how, or why. He supposed the only way he could explain it was that he felt disappointed...and jealous?

_But, why do I feel this way? Shuichi is happy. _Maybe he wanted some of what Shuichi had, but with Ayaka?

"Hiro, hurry up! Put the foot to the petal! Or..." Shuichi trailed off as he put his hand to his chin, trying to figure out what he was saying. "What's that saying K always screams when he wants Sakano-san to drive faster?" he asked, now looking at Hiro for the answer.

Hiro chuckled as he got onto the bike, putting his own helmet on. Leave it to Shuichi to make him momentarily forget his dilemmas. "You mean, put the petal to the metal?"

"Yeah, that's the one!" Shuichi nodded, wrapping his arms around Hiro's waist. "What does that mean?"

Hiro struggled to come up with an answer, since he wasn't entirely sure himself. K's American sayings usually floated right over him. "Drive faster?" he offered with a sheepish laugh.

"In any case," Shuichi said with a shrug. "Put the petal to the metal!"

When the two arrived at NG, they were forced to park across the street, since there was so much of the parking already taken up. Hiro didn't mind, since he didn't care for using the parking lot. If anything happened to his bike, no one would see it.

"We're right on time!" Shuichi declared as he set the helmet to hang on one of the steering handles.

Hiro did the same, running his fingers through his hair for a quick fix as he noticed the time on his watch. "Actually, we're a little over two minutes late."

Shuichi had a panicky look in his eyes as he turned and stood there, waiting for all the cars to pass by so he could cross the street. He started to jog in place, looking very anxious at the moment. "K is gonna' shoot me, I just know it!"

Hiro walked up beside him, patting him on the back. "Maybe he's in a good mood today." K's good mood days were always nice, since he settled for firing a warning shot at their feet instead of shooting them in the face. Those bullets may have been blank, but they hurt like Hell.

"Let's just cross now," Shuichi said impatiently.

Hiro opened his mouth to insist that he wait for the light, even if there was no car in sight, but Shuichi was too fast. He had already starting moving foreword, half jogging to the other side of the street.

Hiro had reluctantly decided to follow behind him, but had halted for about a second when he saw something cherry red in the distance, moving awfully close to the curb at great speed. A car.

It all happened in a couple of seconds, but the moment seemed to have lasted for hours. The fear that filled Hiro upon seeing the speeding car swerving to avoid him, accidentally redirecting its unintentional aim towards Shuichi. The feeling of his heart _pounding _against his chest to the point where it physically ached. The feeling of his mouth going dry, tasting something that can only be described as gray. The anger he felt at his body for stalling and growing weak, making his knees wobbly when he should have _immediately _sprung into action.

All those feelings felt like they lasted forever, but in reality went by in about a second; a second before Hiro ran forward and wrapped his arms around Shuichi's waist, yanking him back until he felt his back slam against a parked car, triggering an alarm that rang in his ears.

The car sped by, continuing on its merry way.

The alarm was deafening, but Hiro wasn't paying too much attention to his almost bleeding ears. He was more focused on the now shaking body that he held in his arms as he leaned against the car, having slid down into a sitting position.

Hiro's breathing was ragged as he held onto Shuichi, who's chest was rising and falling at a rapid pace. His heart was still beating rapidly, but it wasn't as painful as it was before.

"Hiro?"

Hiro looked down at Shuichi, who's neck was craned a bit so he could look at him. His whole demeanor seemed so...normal, like he hadn't just almost been run down by a speeding car.

"Yeah?" Hiro asked, his grip tightening.

"We're late."

Hiro stared down at him for a few moments. He was so relieved that his best friend was okay that Hiro had forgotten to yell at him for nearly making him shit himself. All he could do was laugh, and that's all he did. After that was over, he finally spoke.

"Fuck work," Hiro breathed out. "I think K-san will understand. If not, we have Sakano-san that will back us up."

Shuichi moved to get up, forcing Hiro to release his grip. He must have just noticed the loud alarm, because he threw his hands to his ears.

Hiro pushed himself off the ground with a grunt, his whole body still a bit shaky. He looked over at Shuichi and saw that he seemed just fine.

"Shuichi, are you okay?" he asked curiously, placing a hand on his shoulder.

"I'm fine," he replied simply. "That was a close one, thanks." He smiled at Hiro.

_I was a second away from never seeing that stupid smile ever again. _That thought startled him. Even though it had only been for a split second, he genuinely thought that he was going to lose Shuichi.

"Shuichi, c'mere man."

Hiro didn't even await a reply before he pulled Shuichi into a bear-hug, squeezing onto him as tight as he could, his fingers curling around the fabric of his clothing. Apart of him wondered if maybe he was overreacting, but his logical side was quickly dismissing that. What reason would he have to overreact? They're best friends, and he was almost hit by a car.

"You two love birds take the love-fest somewhere else, you're overload of lovin' is setting off my car alarm!"

Though Hiro's grip remained on Shuichi, his head turned to see a short, stocky, bald man standing in front of the car. He took out a small black device from his pocket and pressed a button, thus putting an end to the loud alarm.

Shuichi gently pulled himself away from Hiro, tugging on the sleeve of his leather jacket. "C'mon, let's go to work."

Hiro's gaze left the bald man and moved back to Shuichi. "No...can we just, go back?" Hiro asked, pulling Shuichi towards the bike.

"But we're already here," Shuichi protested, giving Hiro a concerned look. "Are you okay? If it's about what just happened, I'm fine."

Hiro felt embarrassed. Shuichi was nearly hit by a car and he's fine, yet his own heart hadn't stopped beating rapidly. He knew it was natural to be concerned for someone that you cared about, of course, but the fear he felt...even now, as he stared at a perfectly fine, not-dead-Shuichi...

He was just so passionate about making sure his friend was okay, no matter what. And the passion he displayed and felt after the car almost hit Shuichi; he just couldn't shake it.

It lingered.

"I know, I just..." Hiro trailed off, not knowing what to say. He ended up laughing nervously as he rubbed the back of his head. "Just, come on."

"Okay, okay," Shuichi replied with fake exasperation as he moved over to the bike. He was stopped when Hiro placed his hand on his shoulder to stop him from mounting the bike.

"Let's take the bus."

* * *

"Hiro, what the hell?"

Shuichi's eyes blinked in confusion as he watched his friend stare out the window. He had been sitting on the bed with his back faced to Shuichi, who was on the small couch. He hadn't really said anything since the two arrived back at his place, nor did he really want to. He wanted to sort out his feelings. He supposed it would have been a better idea for him to do so alone, but he didn't want Shuichi out of his sight at the moment. It was almost as if he needed him there _to _sort out his feelings.

Shuichi stood up and walked behind Hiro, throwing himself on the bed beside him. He crossed his arms under his chin as he stared out window as well. "You're acting funny," he stated simply.

Hiro's gaze remained fixated on the window. "Oh?" He finally looked down at Shuichi, who rolled over to lay on his back and return the stare. "Look who's talking," he chuckled, trying to lighten the mood.

Shuichi grinned. "Yeah, well you're acting even weirder than me."

Had he been that obvious? He didn't really believe he was discreet about it, but he didn't think he was so blatantly obvious either.

"Is it about what happened earlier with the car?" Shuichi asked, probing further.

Hiro sighed in defeat, knowing that Shuichi wasn't going to let up. As he stared down at him, he couldn't help that feeling of extreme gratitude that washed over his very soul for Shuichi being there, at that moment. How many times in Hiro's life had he been worried about Shuichi's well being to the point where he would lose sleep, or to the point where he felt fear rearing its ugly head? There were far too many times to count, and yet none of them compared to how he felt when he saw that car speeding towards him.

It had dawned on him rather subtly, the answer to his questions slowly seeping into his brain like liquid through the cracks of a broken glass. Then the glass broke, and all the answers washed all over him, nearly drowning him right then and there.

He had been in denial, and that incident brought him out of it.

He was developing feelings for Shindou Shuichi.

"Shit," Hiro groaned, bringing his hand to his face. He could feel the perspiration seeping from the pores of his palms. The very thought of growing romantic feelings for his best friend was making his stomach go crazy like a roller coaster.

Shuichi sat up straight. Although Hiro couldn't see it, Shuichi's brows were furrowed in a mixture of confusion and worry. "Hiro, what's the matter with you?"

Hiro didn't answer. He wanted to, but he just _couldn't. _He felt his shoulders slump and his whole being collapse in on itself. Had he been alone, he would have just thrown himself on the bed and groan in displeasure as he felt yet another problem adding itself to his 'things to worry about' list.

He did _not _need this, nor did he want it.

"Say something!"

Shuichi's panicked voice pierced through Hiro's mind as he felt two hands firmly grasp his shoulder, reminding him that he was not alone in the room, and that he shouldn't be falling apart at the moment. Shuichi had moved in front of him now, his face leaning closer to try and get a look at Hiro's face. When Hiro raised his gaze to meet Shuichi's, he was able to see the worry held in those violet globes.

Right then, staring into his best friend's eyes, Hiro knew he'd have to endure whatever problems came from his feelings for Shuichi by himself. He knew he'd have to push those feelings deep down inside and keep them there, in his heart, locked away. And he also knew he would never breath a word of his feelings to Shuichi or anyone.

Hiro wanted Shuichi to be happy, and he was happiest being Eiri Yuki's lover, and Hiro's best friend, so that is how he intended things to remain. He had the self discipline to control his own feelings, and he was sure he could keep a lid on them. So long as he could see his friend happy, he would be fine.

He may not have been able to love him like a lover would, but he could still love him like a friend, and that was good enough for him.

"Hiro, if this is about earlier I'm sorry I scared you, okay? But now you're scaring me! Say something or-"

"You talk way too much," Hiro finally forced out, his voice a little shaky. When he realized how he sounded, he cleared his throat and took in a deep breath before exhaling. "I'm fine, I just have a headache. And _you're _not helping," he finished with a smirk, trying to shift Shuichi's attention away from Hiro's troubled demeanor.

Shuichi let go of Hiro's shoulders and crossed his arms. "Well sorry! Jerk!"

Hiro laughed lightly, feeling a bit better about the situation, now that his little episode had passed. "I'm starved. Order pizza?"

Shuichi shrugged.

"It's on me."

The young vocalist instantly perked up, hopping off the bed and practically diving for the phone.

As Shuichi ordered the usual from the same expensive pizza shop, Hiro's gaze wandered back to the same place out the window it had been on before, which Shuichi failed to notice.

...Back on the big, glaring billboard with Eiri Yuki's face on it.

And as he stared, he couldn't hold back that tiny pang of anger that jabbed at his gut. Eiri Yuki made Shuichi happy, and he was grateful for that, but Hiro couldn't stop asking himself why _he _didn't get the chance to make Shuichi happy in that way.

Why Yuki?

_It's like they just...gravitate to each other._

"Five minutes until the pizza gets here, Hiro. Wanna' do something for five minutes?" Shuichi asked with a chuckle.

_I just compliment him...Yuki completes him._

"Sure thing," Hiro replied with a forced chuckle of his own, closing the curtains.

* * *

**A/N: **Now that I've got the story rolling, things should start happening more often. I'd like to thank Dstar5 for the lovely review, and anyone else who is reading along. Concrit always appreciated.

Next Chapter: Sparks of Confusion


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